As you realize, I'm moving from Portland to Nashville in a couple weeks (gulp). I've started selling most of my stuff and becoming all of the logistics figured out, and everything's going pretty much so far. There's one thing, though, that's been weighing on me since i have began the process of relocating my entire life: I'm freaking out about leaving my best friend, Katelyn.
We met during college at Portland State and also have been inseparable since. Currently, we see one another at least 2 or 3 times a week, even though we're very good at talking on the telephone too, the thought of putting thousands of miles between us is daunting to say the least. Since Ami provided such great advice about moving, I decided to ask my Frisky coworkers for suggestions about how to make an extended distance friendship work. It turns out that Jessica, especially, provides extensive experience in this arena, with friends scattered all over the globe.
Read on for their top 10 LDF tips, and please share your own experiences and advice in the comments!
1. Never stop texting
Julie recommends keeping your old texting habits intact. \”I think you should still text them about the mundane crap in your life and theirs,\” she says, exactly like you would when you lived in the same location. Jess swears by the iPhone app WhatsApp for free texting: \”It's a lifesaver!\”
2. Visit them as much as possible
Katelyn and that i have already dedicated the majority of our travel budgets to visiting each other (I'm going to be aware of Southwest Airlines Nashville-Portland route like the back of my hand!). Jessica suggests using AirFareWatchdog to keep watch for the lowest fares.
3. Skype, duh
Skype video enables you to feel much closer than regular phone calls. Amelia recommends planning specific Skype dates, \”like seeing exactly the same movie and becoming on Skype to talk about it after, or cooking the same meal together and eating it at the same time.\” I love this idea, and Katelyn and that i are excited to schedule some Skype tea dates.
4. Make a schedule
If there is a huge time difference (like NYC to Israel), don't hesitate to schedule weekend phone calls ahead of time.
5. Keep emails simple and frequent
\”A lot of people think keeping in touch means writing long emails backwards and forwards constantly,\” says Jess. \”My friends and I just constantly write shorter emails backwards and forwards during the day, making us feel more a part of one another's lives.\” I've had other long distance friendships fizzle because I always felt like I desired to create long, all-encompassing emails, and that i didn't have time, so I'm definitely going to keep this in your mind!
6. Send free ecards to right away celebrate major events
SomeECards has free ecards and so does Bust Magazine's web site.
7. Offer your couch
\”Always inform them they're thanks for visiting stay at your home when they want to come visit,\” Jess advises. \”Some people feel weird about the imposition.\”
8. Send some love in the mail
\”When I studied abroad in Prague in college, someone sent us a bunch of old Bitch magazines and it helped me so happy,\” says Jess. Julie and her BFF, who lives in Bay area, send random postcards to each other. \”Mail is the greatest!\” says Julie, and that i totally agree. Plus, whatever I'm able to do in order to support my mailman is a great thing.
9. Be honest
Try to let the other know what's going on should you be out of touch for awhile. If you are going through a tough patch and need to request additional phone time, let them know that too. Just keep those lines of communication open as much as possible. It will make you feel closer and prevent any resentment from building.
10. Accept that change is inevitable
\”Don't expect the friendship to be exactly the same once you don't reside in the same place,\” says Ami, \”but know that it will still be there.\” True that.
Alright, Frisky readers, I'd love to learn about your long distance friendships! How can you keep the friendship fires burning? Have you ever were built with a friendship fizzle out due to distance? How would you react differently later on to make it last? Produce the scoop in the comments.